On Mark Sanford. Or not.

“Her”, as she has come to be called, is at some sort of conference in Orlando, leaving “Him” without a chatting companion with which to commit time theft. If ‘Jon & Kate + 8″ have taught us anything, it is this: The show must go on.

How interesting. How bizarre. Frankly, I’ve long since given up on moral expectations for those in the political realm. As I was raised in a conservative family, the “atrocities” of the Clinton-Lewinsky mess rendered my 13 year old self scandalized. How could the president of the United States have an extra-marital affair? How could he lie to the American public, those very citizens that elected him into office? In retrospect, the more astute question would be “How could a man of such towering intellect be reduced to a discussion of semantics concerning marital infidelity?” The answer, I suppose , is simple: because he couldn’t keep his dick in his pants. Not surprising, really.

At least not anymore. Marital infidelity has never been exactly condoned by the American electorate, but to say that it renders one unfit to hold political office is just as untrue of a statement. I remember my grandmother, an educated liberal who somehow birthed my ultra-conservative father, chiming in on the issue. “It’s not like every other president hasn’t done this before,” she combatted, “It’s simply the fact that he got caught”. This woman voted for Clinton twice and had she had the option, would have certainly voted for him again; that having been said, she was not immune to sleaze that oozed from the Clinton Administration. Neither she nor I fully understood the extent to which the Internet would affect the moral structure of politics. She went on the Internet a handful of times toward the end of her life, but I don’t think she ever really could wrap her head around it. CNN was more her thing; I still maintain that it was a 12 hour a day CNN habit, rather than heart disease and old age, that led to her demise. Try spending your retirement wallowing in what must have seemed like apocalyptic images and videos*, see how long you live.

Now, the internet’s effect on the world in undeniable. Well-educated but uninformed idiots like myself now maintain access to a bevy of information at any hour of the day. It comes so quickly that it is impossible to keep up; even in the 15 minutes I’ve spent writing this little ditty, I’m sure I’ve missed some juicy little bit about Mark Sanford’s South American sexcapades. Perhaps what I’m missing will render this entire argument irrelevant.

What I do know is this: Although harping on conservatives is a legitimate pastime of mine (others include trashy television and high-brow non-fiction) I can no longer in good conscience attempt to vilify the Republican party for its inadherence its own “Family Values” platform. To do so is to passively accept the claim that the Republican Party is the party of “Family Values” in the first place, when we all are aware that this notion is an oversimplification of the American two-party system. Nothing in this world is black and white (except for President Obama, race joke SCORE). Some of us, of all political persuasions, are still clinging to the tired idea that Gay Marriage and Abortion rights are still the hot-button issues we face in America.  They aren’t, but think of how wonderful it would be if this were true.

Our left-leaning President is a member of the Democratic Party, and he does not support gay marriage. He holds this view in common with my mother, who is a self-identifying member of the Christian Right.When I bring this fact to her attention, she seems unconcerned; I believe it is the tit-for-tat nature of the two party system that has caused this willfully ignorant attitude in America. We pour over ever detail of imperfect, human lives; we search for any and all indiscretions that would make one unelectable, and we do so with pride. I do it to, but I have to say that I’m growing tired of it. 

Unfortunately, many Americans aren’t at all disgusted with these back-and-forth attacks, as demonstrated by second election of George W. Bush followed by a relatively large victory by President Obama. With this in mind, I wonder what will become of Mr. Obama’s presidency. What skeleton is which closet might creak open the door and spread its marrow in red headlines across the Drudge Report? 

So Mark Sanford had an affair with a South American woman. So he disappeared for a week and didn’t tell his wife where he was. So his Twitter account mysteriously kept updating itself while he did whatever-he-did-do. (I’m sure we’ll all know soon). Are we really shocked by his indiscretions and dishonesty?** We live in America, where we love to put people on pedestals and watch them fall to obscurity. America, home of Britney Spears, Eliot Spitzer, Michael Vick, those Jon and Kate plus 8 babies, Dick Cheney,  John Edwards***, and yes Mark Sanford. (despite his South American rendezvous, as far as I know, his citizenship remains intact).

 

I think this is the only one of those kids that matters

 

 

 

In re-reading my words, I realize that not much of this concerns Mark Sanford. I guess this hearkens back to my loss of faith in morality of American politicians back in 1998.  In that way, I’m thankful to have lost it at a young age. It may not be a “loss” after all. The recognition that ALL people make mistakes every day, for any number of reasons, might be beneficial to all.  It might just be the first step toward creating a society that does not force its leaders to lie about sexual indiscretions in order to maintain power, and then purges said leaders from the political landscape. 

 

*  I refer, of course, to two conflicts in Iraq, the two World Trade Center disasters. AND Wolf Blitzer. Terrifying.

** Rhetorical question. Of course we still are. Could you imagine the extent to which a scandal the size of Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi’s would rock our world? (This second question is not rhetorical.)

** At least I think he still lives here. Haven’t heard much from him lately. Too bad, I used to love that guy.

 

 

Obviously up to something